I Hate It

Even though we've both received our first vaccination I'm still worried when she has to go out anywhere....and I hate being like that...

I never imagined that I'd be afraid of the outside world for another reason....

Wasn't it enough that for years I was terrified of being caught outside by someone I knew while I was dressed in my pretty things?

Wasn't it enough that I was terrified through most of my teen years of random violence coming my way....just because I was who I was?

Now there's a pernicious virus lurking outside that wants to kill us....

I know my fear is irrational....but it's there and I can't deny it...

So when she's due home I wait and watch for her....almost like the goddamned virus is going to leap out of hiding and get her as soon as she opens her car door...

We get our second dose in about ten days....but even then I doubt the fear will fade....

In the meantime I'm waiting for her to come home to me where she'll be safe...